A big thanks to all the girls who commented last night. It really made me feel better, especially since when I wrote the post I was covered in tears and my face was a swollen piece of meat.
There was one part of the story I guess I forgot to mention. Among all the emotional hurt I never made clear that I asked Aaron the question of whether or not he'd ever imagined himself with another girl, and I asked because of a story I read on FML.com. For some reason all the guys on that site are cheaters or plain jerks...so yeah he didn't bring the topic up out of the blue. But that didn't make his response any less shocking.
But anyways thanks for being so supportive. I know for some people a scenario like this isn't a big deal (but obviously I'm not one of them haha). Aaron and I talked a lot last night and I think we're ok. He has this problem with emotions...as in he's convinced he can't feel anything emotionally. I guess to some extent that's true, but then again I'm fairly sure he doesn't try to work through the issue and instead I'm the one who feels like he doesn't care about me and isn't very invested in making sure I'm 100% happy in this relationship. Case in point: when he ignored me last night. Oh but he's not the only one with problems I suppose. I have this little eating disorder thing...(which, by the way, I'm practically flailing on front of him and he acts as if he doesn't see it). But this is all too depressing for me to drone on about for this entire post.
On to happier topics...
Olivia: Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah! In a few short months we're going to be fellow banana slugs! We should totally take some dance classes together or hit up the gym or go to a midnight movie or something. Do you know where you're living? Ah probably the transfer house in Porter I guess. I'm *crossing my fingers* that I'll have an apartment there next year, but I might have to go back into the dorms or get an apartment at Kresge or something. I'm so excited and happy for you. =)
Food: I've already had breakfast. A banana (70 cal), and 4 oz of strawberry yogurt with 25 blueberries (130 cal), so if I eat nothing else and go to dance class I'll already be at -150 calories for the day, although that probably won't happen. I think today I'll try to get in 30 minutes at the gym and burn off another 350 calories, which means with dance that's 700 calories burned, which means I can only eat a max of 550 calories, which means I have 350 left to eat. I'm praying they'll be some good, low cal soups in the dining halls today. I'm already sick and probably working my body harder than I should, so I should at least have the option of having some healthy food options, not the regular pizza, clam chowder, and burgers that keep flying in my face. Can I hear a whoop whoop for chicken noodle? Or maybe some pozole? Or veggie medley?
Ah I'm rambling. I'll be back later. With thinspo!
Update: Just updated my "Measurements" tab because I thought it was time to take my measurements again. I've lost almost 5 inches! What I'd really like to be in the future is something like 34-25-35. My waist-to-hip ratio now is about .74, and with those measurements it would be .71, which is much closer to the ideal .7 (i.e. my waist is 70% the circumference of my hips).
Christy: A waist-to-hip ratio of 70% is supposed to be the most appealing to men. Divide the circumference of your waist by the circumference of your hips and multiply by 100 and you get your w-t-h percentage. 70% is the ideal ratio. Basically it's just another motivation for me to lose weight.